Everyday Life

Would you believe it?

Ha ha ha!! No sooner do I amend a paragraph in my second post to say 
I’ll mention my husband a few times during my tale. Right now, today, April 9th 2014, he is still my husband but I am expecting the Decree Nici to land on my doormat with a premeditated extra ominous thud, in the next week or so.” 
than the bloomin things arrives! 

By email first and the thud on the doormat arrived the day later, but come on!!! It seems I lied to you:

 Ha ha ha ha ha ha ahhaaaaaaa. Hmmmmn….

At least it well make things easy in the future. As soon as my story is no longer rhetorical and is present day, if he ever needs mentioning, I can call him d*%#head Ex husband. Wow. I have an ex husband. I am an ex wife! Yuck! That sounds horrid. What’s the saddest thing about it all is that my beautiful, amazing, happy, crazy, clever, sweet and sensitive baby boy, now, at 27 months old, has divorced parents. My poor baby boy. He didn’t get to know conventional family life and family time was snatched here and there but was over far too soon. 
I ‘fortunately’ go into this blind. Fortunately as my parents are still together after about 42/43 years but unfortunately, this means I have no idea how this feels and how my son will feel. What will be the hardest thing for him a and how do I make it easier? My worst fear is that he tries to please his mummy and his daddy and makes himself unhappy. 
I don’t ever want him to feel torn between us. If I’m an old lady spinster (please god no!!!) I don’t want him to worry about me and stay in to keep me company when he should be out having fun. Saying that, I am presuming that my sweet sweet baby boy will grow into a very sensitive young man. The reality could be that ‘Mum’ is like, sooo uncool and he’s off out with his mates as she’s a boring old lady!!!! Oh god! How am I going to get this right?!!! I think the responsibility of parenting has finally hit me. Well that only took approx 822 days. 
Thanks for reading and please leave a comment.

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